Ok...today can't be as bad as last week...I was geared up... no loola thoughts (maybe one or two!)....had a good week running after my complete downer and a disastrous 16 last week..was tempted to just quit running altogether...but I coaxed myself round to being a positive mental head...I can do it...I've done the training so what's stopping me...
It's the mind...it's very good at playing tricks and looking for ways to f$¥k up the run..'ah sher I'll stop,I'm tired' but in actual fact I'm not tired so what stops me? the little voice of laziness is the culprit...any excuse... since I've started running I've overcome a lot...every week there is something that I learn from or that I'll do differently on my next run...tick by tick I'm getting there...after the Great Limerick run I've decided to do the Cork Half Marathon...and then the Ring of Kerry...why not...there used to be a large arsed shaped dent on my couch but not since Xmas....That dent is shrinking...the only reason I started this fitness regime is for one goal and one goal only...to loose weight...and to get healthy...lost nearly 2 stone and I've 2 to go...it will be slow but I will do it...
Down to the good part...my 2nd 16 miler..to be totally honest I did wake up 'worried'..I can't lie and say 'really looked forward to it,oh what joy I'm only doing 16 today'...what crap...if I wasn't worried that would be strange! But it was a good worry...I had it all planned...but the one part of the run I wasn't doing was the pebbly parts up Tonavane and the Quarry...reason: they kill my feet! I've problems with my feet so big pebbles are not good...pain ouch pain....
Started out at 9.30...kept my usual silent running pattern...large group out...split up as usual but our group has kind of stayed the same...slightly windy and no sun...brilliant...fecking brilliant...chit chat within the group all the way along the road up to Caherwisheen...to be honest I wasn't tuned it...Marcus passed one comment 'remember back to the one minute jogging before Xmas'...of course I bloody do I was cursing you then and I'm still cursing you 5 months on! I grunted back...needed to get past the point in the road where I stopped last week...I stopped at the green electricity box...I glanced as I passed and thought to myself I feel good so why the hell did I stop last week! Kept going woohoo..we went down about two miles and turned...it's a long boring road...but I decided to count the the front doors of houses! it helped... retreated back up towards Kearney's rd..was chatting about the swimming that is starting up next week....looking forward to it...love swimming...even-though I only learnt last year but swimming it not as stressful as running! and I'm good at it..no fighting with myself out in the water...headed near the top of the rugby club...I stopped...but only to take a gel...can't run and do both! that's another thing i have to practice...drinking and running...got going pretty quickly...woohoo feet are good and my IT band isn't bothering me...my hip was flaring up last week and couldn't barely move...went to Una Lynch in Blennerville who dug her elbows into it to release it! Didn't know elbows could cause so much pain and torture but it worked..
Trotted along happy happy...hit the base of Tonavane and walked for a bit,ran for a bit...didn't run all the way up the hill but that didn't bother me...might do it next week...at the top refilled drinks...was so sick of lucozade sport...I was parched...must investigate a different drink coz that doesn't feel good half way through..the rest of the group headed up the stoney path up further and myself and Catriona started to head back...didn't want to stiffen up...was dreaming of diet coke at this stage! would have loved a sup just to quench my thirst! 6 or 7 miles to go...woohoo I knew at this point that I was feeling good and I'd make it home in good spirits...loola
Surpringly I kept running and running...no complaints only thirst...the sun was starting to shine...feck...that spurred me on! Niall and Rose were behind us back the road...hit the hill before Lidl...feckers caught up to us..ok only a miles to go...head down..legs stiff..and starting to swelter...some fella asked us the time...a quick 'no' and toddled on...that last stretch home was tough but not as tough as last week...last week I stopped so many times to stretch that I'd be quicker crawling!
Got into the car park...party! Fecking brilliant was delighted with myself...couldn't get too excited was bursting for a pee! I needed a good week and this was it...
Bought myself a diet coke on the way home... didn't care...it was the best thing ive ever had! i can see how i was addicted to it...moderation is the key...felt famished when i got home... sickly...but didn't eat for a while...the gels just turn my tummy...tried to go for a nap but i might as well have rolled my eyes for the hour as i just couldnt sleep...so got up, ate, showered and did gardening for a couple of hours!
18 miles next week...36 miles in total for next weeks running...am getting there...
Sunday, 25 March 2012
Thursday, 22 March 2012
Tues 5 miles ,Wed 6.36 miles,Thurs 5 miles...the midgees were out in full support!
Was on a bit of a downer after Sundays run...just was not a happy camper....so I had to get my arse back in gear...literally...
Loola thoughts have to go....I'm very good at putting myself down and having no confidence...running is very hard but I'm making it harder for myself by stressing and always thinking the worst....that's why I think running is going to turn me into a complete nut head! It's coming to near the end of the marathon training and I actually feel as if I'm going backward...
This week I had a change of scenery...tues went running around Fenit...being honest I didn't do the full 5 miles tues but I wasn't far off...wed I went running with Hazel and Catriona....for the first time I realise how important it is to have running buddies...they distracted me the whole way round with chit chat (yes it is a first woohoo!) and idle comments like ' is that a dog or a small horse' ( Couldn't figure out what it was!)...the midgees kept my occupied..I was doing pretend sword fights all the way round and the odd spit here and there...one got into my eye and normally I'd stop but I wanted to keep going....c'mon I'm training for a bloody marathon I can't be stopping! fecking midgees....
This evening I was working in Killarney so myself and Catriona decided to run the 5 miles around the national park...it was nice for a change...didn't seem as mundane...it was pissing rain but that didn't bother me..I am a runner....even managed to crack a few jokes...very quickly tho!
Anyone who thinks of running as being fun does not know the meaning of it! The first ten minutes of every run is hellish every time....running requires an effort every time.....but I do understand and have accepted that for every run I have to just buck up mentally....so as for me to avoid unnecessary disappointment and motivation meltdown...the after affects on bad days really just wear you down...but the good days outweigh the bad...
16 miles again this sat...I promise to do my very best....for me...
Loola thoughts have to go....I'm very good at putting myself down and having no confidence...running is very hard but I'm making it harder for myself by stressing and always thinking the worst....that's why I think running is going to turn me into a complete nut head! It's coming to near the end of the marathon training and I actually feel as if I'm going backward...
This week I had a change of scenery...tues went running around Fenit...being honest I didn't do the full 5 miles tues but I wasn't far off...wed I went running with Hazel and Catriona....for the first time I realise how important it is to have running buddies...they distracted me the whole way round with chit chat (yes it is a first woohoo!) and idle comments like ' is that a dog or a small horse' ( Couldn't figure out what it was!)...the midgees kept my occupied..I was doing pretend sword fights all the way round and the odd spit here and there...one got into my eye and normally I'd stop but I wanted to keep going....c'mon I'm training for a bloody marathon I can't be stopping! fecking midgees....
This evening I was working in Killarney so myself and Catriona decided to run the 5 miles around the national park...it was nice for a change...didn't seem as mundane...it was pissing rain but that didn't bother me..I am a runner....even managed to crack a few jokes...very quickly tho!
Anyone who thinks of running as being fun does not know the meaning of it! The first ten minutes of every run is hellish every time....running requires an effort every time.....but I do understand and have accepted that for every run I have to just buck up mentally....so as for me to avoid unnecessary disappointment and motivation meltdown...the after affects on bad days really just wear you down...but the good days outweigh the bad...
16 miles again this sat...I promise to do my very best....for me...
Monday, 19 March 2012
Sun 16 miles....definitely one for the record books but for all the wrong reasons!
Ok....16 miles...what a disaster...well the last few miles were torture...
Started out at 9.30 in the aquadome carpark...sun was shining again...Marcus promised me that the temp would be low...bob hope and no hope...driving in on sat morning it's a bad sign if I've to put on the sunglasses driving...shite it's going to be another roasting hiding under the trees run...
Started off slow pace...it's gonna be a long one...there were about ten in our group....Marcus loaded up his rugsack beforehand with our drinks...the poor fecker...he quoted its training for his Ultramarathon...even the thought of that makes me sick to the bottom of my tummy...what mad eejit would run 100 miles...there is no sane reason whatsoever..definitely a screw loose there...but I suppose he has to have to put up with us...
Skipped along ' the road by lidl' and up to the usual caherwisheen cross....was quiet this smorning even I don't talk very much anyway but I was kinda of focus on settling myself...takes me about 20 mins to thaw out the loola tendencies and then I begin to settle....an extra two miles this week...great another shite weekend...sore trunks,gaunt look and yawning....
We swing a left at the top of the road...was feeling good...sun was out...lovely jubley... love wearing wetty sweaty t shirts on a sat morning...plod along...Marcus keeps going and going and going along the back road...hit the back rd to castlemaine and crossed over like a group of swans crossing the road...there was a man at the junction waiting to pull out and his car conked with all the gawking at us...the poor fella didn't know what was coming towards him...we all laughed...
Retreated back the long road....towards the base of the short mountain...don't even ask me why but I started to stress...it just comes out of nowhere....ever since I've started this running I constantly feel stressed! Not good for the ould tic tock but I might consider bringing out some brown paper bags for the panic attacks....all ul see on the side of the road is a red faced sweaty loola hiding underneath the trees with a brown paper bag over the gob trying to breath! what a sight...
Will any run be a good run...don't think so..
Was kind of ok till roughly near the base of the hill before toonavane....I'm definitely not born to be a runner...I just stressed all the way...then the stress just upsets the whole run....I going to have to come up with some mechanism to de-stress....maybe if I gave up running that would be the obvious ans but I'm not a quitter...well this time I'm not...too much work has gone into it this time and the marathon is so close....
At the base of tonavane i walked for a min...The group weren't too far ahead...I'd say about 2 mins...but in my own mental head I just acted like a delirious nuthead....saw some of the faster group coming down the hill towards me...normally id begin to run again until they ran past me just to save face...but stubborn me just walked and I wasn't a happy camper at this point so I didn't give a hoot who saw me!
Ran up toonavane....and up further up the hill again...knew it was going to be a long road home...5 miles to go...wasn't woohooing at this stage...took a gel but really I think they do feck all for me.... I might as well be popping tic tacs......they are revolting and always when I take one I make very strange faces like a baby tasting new food...would love to spit it back out but I do have manners....
Panic attack sets in...I know when it's going to start...start to heavy breath and throat starts to close...never ever did I realise what a panic attack was until I started running...never had one before...it can be quite frightening but off I go to the side of the road pretending to open my shoe....Cami stops and comes over...tried to hide to gasping for breath but the noise was just too loud! told her to go ahead quite politely but she didn't get the message so then I told her to feck off and she still didnt get the message....oh my god woman! she was smiling at me so how could I be rude to her again! She was telling me about her woes with running and at least I didn't feel like such a nuthead...plodded along just before the rugby club and at this point I was giving up running.... not a hope in hell am I coming back...Feck Marcus...feck em all...stopped dead in the road and demanded my car keys off Catriona...I'm going home and chopping up my running gear and throwing away my trainers so I definitely can't come back...nearly just nearly took the short road home...but I didn't....right hip was about to fall off...but there was only two miles to go...who cares if I walk run it...so I did just that...the last mile home was the longest mile of my life.... it seemed forever....met a few doggies along the way and they normally make me smile but they were actually walking faster than I was running...the shame...
How the hell am I going to do this marathon...I honestly don't know but one thing I do know is I'm going to keep the running up...I won't do a great first marathon but I will finish it...and that's the point of this...The Great Limerick run will be the start to a new life....I've lost 4 pounds this week...weighed myself this smorning...So in the last 3 weeks I've lost half a stone...thing will get better if I just keep doing what I'm doing...perseverance...and torture...
16 miles again next week....normally after a bad week I get a good week...sweet Jesus...
Started out at 9.30 in the aquadome carpark...sun was shining again...Marcus promised me that the temp would be low...bob hope and no hope...driving in on sat morning it's a bad sign if I've to put on the sunglasses driving...shite it's going to be another roasting hiding under the trees run...
Started off slow pace...it's gonna be a long one...there were about ten in our group....Marcus loaded up his rugsack beforehand with our drinks...the poor fecker...he quoted its training for his Ultramarathon...even the thought of that makes me sick to the bottom of my tummy...what mad eejit would run 100 miles...there is no sane reason whatsoever..definitely a screw loose there...but I suppose he has to have to put up with us...
Skipped along ' the road by lidl' and up to the usual caherwisheen cross....was quiet this smorning even I don't talk very much anyway but I was kinda of focus on settling myself...takes me about 20 mins to thaw out the loola tendencies and then I begin to settle....an extra two miles this week...great another shite weekend...sore trunks,gaunt look and yawning....
We swing a left at the top of the road...was feeling good...sun was out...lovely jubley... love wearing wetty sweaty t shirts on a sat morning...plod along...Marcus keeps going and going and going along the back road...hit the back rd to castlemaine and crossed over like a group of swans crossing the road...there was a man at the junction waiting to pull out and his car conked with all the gawking at us...the poor fella didn't know what was coming towards him...we all laughed...
Retreated back the long road....towards the base of the short mountain...don't even ask me why but I started to stress...it just comes out of nowhere....ever since I've started this running I constantly feel stressed! Not good for the ould tic tock but I might consider bringing out some brown paper bags for the panic attacks....all ul see on the side of the road is a red faced sweaty loola hiding underneath the trees with a brown paper bag over the gob trying to breath! what a sight...
Will any run be a good run...don't think so..
Was kind of ok till roughly near the base of the hill before toonavane....I'm definitely not born to be a runner...I just stressed all the way...then the stress just upsets the whole run....I going to have to come up with some mechanism to de-stress....maybe if I gave up running that would be the obvious ans but I'm not a quitter...well this time I'm not...too much work has gone into it this time and the marathon is so close....
At the base of tonavane i walked for a min...The group weren't too far ahead...I'd say about 2 mins...but in my own mental head I just acted like a delirious nuthead....saw some of the faster group coming down the hill towards me...normally id begin to run again until they ran past me just to save face...but stubborn me just walked and I wasn't a happy camper at this point so I didn't give a hoot who saw me!
Ran up toonavane....and up further up the hill again...knew it was going to be a long road home...5 miles to go...wasn't woohooing at this stage...took a gel but really I think they do feck all for me.... I might as well be popping tic tacs......they are revolting and always when I take one I make very strange faces like a baby tasting new food...would love to spit it back out but I do have manners....
Panic attack sets in...I know when it's going to start...start to heavy breath and throat starts to close...never ever did I realise what a panic attack was until I started running...never had one before...it can be quite frightening but off I go to the side of the road pretending to open my shoe....Cami stops and comes over...tried to hide to gasping for breath but the noise was just too loud! told her to go ahead quite politely but she didn't get the message so then I told her to feck off and she still didnt get the message....oh my god woman! she was smiling at me so how could I be rude to her again! She was telling me about her woes with running and at least I didn't feel like such a nuthead...plodded along just before the rugby club and at this point I was giving up running.... not a hope in hell am I coming back...Feck Marcus...feck em all...stopped dead in the road and demanded my car keys off Catriona...I'm going home and chopping up my running gear and throwing away my trainers so I definitely can't come back...nearly just nearly took the short road home...but I didn't....right hip was about to fall off...but there was only two miles to go...who cares if I walk run it...so I did just that...the last mile home was the longest mile of my life.... it seemed forever....met a few doggies along the way and they normally make me smile but they were actually walking faster than I was running...the shame...
How the hell am I going to do this marathon...I honestly don't know but one thing I do know is I'm going to keep the running up...I won't do a great first marathon but I will finish it...and that's the point of this...The Great Limerick run will be the start to a new life....I've lost 4 pounds this week...weighed myself this smorning...So in the last 3 weeks I've lost half a stone...thing will get better if I just keep doing what I'm doing...perseverance...and torture...
16 miles again next week....normally after a bad week I get a good week...sweet Jesus...
Wednesday, 14 March 2012
Wed 5 miles....it's nearly 9 o'clock... where is the time going...
First thing I have to say is ' thank feck there is no running till sunday'! I am absolutely shattered,legs about to fall off me,eyes squinting and wanting my leaba...
But after all that I did the 5 miles under duress to be honest....I really really didn't want to go running this evening...any excuse would have done...I was praying that Kathleen in the office would loose the plot and with any luck would give me a belt in the shins....anything not to go running.... I was desperate this evening...loola
Half the group have dropped off... I can understand completely as this marathon training is a huge time commitment...it affects everything...drinking,sleeping,eating,working and thinking...
I'm ranting again...hitting the wall tonight...had a hectic week in work and I felt like throwing in the towel tonight...I could retire early...and considered doing a few triathlons..less stress...this argument was going on in my head all the way running home tonight...maybe an odd cycle here and there... happy out...but then I think back to the days when I started this training...I haven't got long to go and I would regret it if I didn't keep it up...we have only 4 or 5 long runs to go so I have to stick it out... for my future sanity...it will be a huge achievement..
Couldn't even do the blog last night as I was so tired and went to bed at 10...woke up still tired...even eating my porridge is becoming mundane...have to buy some blueberries or something to jazz it up...and was starved all week come 11o clock...tummy rumbling like a dormant volcano about to erupt...
Am shattered...might go for a cycle sat just to differentiate things....and it will loosen me out for my long run....
16 miles on Sun....
But after all that I did the 5 miles under duress to be honest....I really really didn't want to go running this evening...any excuse would have done...I was praying that Kathleen in the office would loose the plot and with any luck would give me a belt in the shins....anything not to go running.... I was desperate this evening...loola
Half the group have dropped off... I can understand completely as this marathon training is a huge time commitment...it affects everything...drinking,sleeping,eating,working and thinking...
I'm ranting again...hitting the wall tonight...had a hectic week in work and I felt like throwing in the towel tonight...I could retire early...and considered doing a few triathlons..less stress...this argument was going on in my head all the way running home tonight...maybe an odd cycle here and there... happy out...but then I think back to the days when I started this training...I haven't got long to go and I would regret it if I didn't keep it up...we have only 4 or 5 long runs to go so I have to stick it out... for my future sanity...it will be a huge achievement..
Couldn't even do the blog last night as I was so tired and went to bed at 10...woke up still tired...even eating my porridge is becoming mundane...have to buy some blueberries or something to jazz it up...and was starved all week come 11o clock...tummy rumbling like a dormant volcano about to erupt...
Am shattered...might go for a cycle sat just to differentiate things....and it will loosen me out for my long run....
16 miles on Sun....
Monday, 12 March 2012
Mon 5 miles...under armour my arse!
I think half the group are still recovering from sat as id say there was only about ten of us out tonight...
Tonight was one of my proudest nights yet...only because sat was a tough run in the sweltering heat...but I still got out tonight and did the 5 miles... Marcus took us out the canal route down to the very end of the Cockleshells and back again.. Tonight and every other midweek run to come is all about getting the distance in the legs...so when I started this running malarkey I did say to myself that i would never miss a night unless my legs were hanging off me...and I haven't...woohoo!
Went for lunch on sat into Ballingarry...I don't know if it was the heat on the sat run or what but I couldn't eat my lunch... wasn't hungry and normally I'd horse back my lunch like a starved animal but didn't eat much all day saturday...stupid i know...
So to pep myself up over the weekend after the sat run I said I'd treat myself to a new running outfit...why not..am sick of the same ould t-shirt...eventhough Marcus said stick to the same running gear...and my pants were beginning to fall off me again so I couldn't keep pulling up my running pants during running like a pure farmer....and I decided to throw in a new running bra for good measure...
Off I toddle into manor... limped in like a true athlete with a blister...had a gawk... Crap selection...picked out one...and the lady in the shop comes up to me and said ' let me have a look there girl'... Between trying to cover the boobs and pulling back the curtain,mental head shop assistant was persistent on having a look at my fit... oh for christ's sake woman feck off....what the hell was this nut-head wanting to check my fit for!...I didn't realise that I said ' no thanks I'm fine' out loud...so feck that she threw me off shopping...talk about smothering...back to buying a bra online me thinks...
Then the new running outfit...bought Under Armour top and bottoms...delighted with my purchase I decided to wear it tonight to break it in...felt comfortable...lovely jubley...happy happy...baby blue top and black bottoms 3/4 lenght....dri fit and light...coming back in the canal tonight I looked down underneath my arms and I see big yuckey sweat patches... crap...I hope no one will see me...hence why I always wore black....running along by the aquadome I see everyone standing under the big street light...oh for fecks sake everyone will see my sweaty patches! run into the car park but kind of do a veere right of the group to miss the direct light...so much for my new top....will revert to my black one for now...
7 miles tomorrow night...where will the route be...who cares i have to do it anyway...
Tonight was one of my proudest nights yet...only because sat was a tough run in the sweltering heat...but I still got out tonight and did the 5 miles... Marcus took us out the canal route down to the very end of the Cockleshells and back again.. Tonight and every other midweek run to come is all about getting the distance in the legs...so when I started this running malarkey I did say to myself that i would never miss a night unless my legs were hanging off me...and I haven't...woohoo!
Went for lunch on sat into Ballingarry...I don't know if it was the heat on the sat run or what but I couldn't eat my lunch... wasn't hungry and normally I'd horse back my lunch like a starved animal but didn't eat much all day saturday...stupid i know...
So to pep myself up over the weekend after the sat run I said I'd treat myself to a new running outfit...why not..am sick of the same ould t-shirt...eventhough Marcus said stick to the same running gear...and my pants were beginning to fall off me again so I couldn't keep pulling up my running pants during running like a pure farmer....and I decided to throw in a new running bra for good measure...
Off I toddle into manor... limped in like a true athlete with a blister...had a gawk... Crap selection...picked out one...and the lady in the shop comes up to me and said ' let me have a look there girl'... Between trying to cover the boobs and pulling back the curtain,mental head shop assistant was persistent on having a look at my fit... oh for christ's sake woman feck off....what the hell was this nut-head wanting to check my fit for!...I didn't realise that I said ' no thanks I'm fine' out loud...so feck that she threw me off shopping...talk about smothering...back to buying a bra online me thinks...
Then the new running outfit...bought Under Armour top and bottoms...delighted with my purchase I decided to wear it tonight to break it in...felt comfortable...lovely jubley...happy happy...baby blue top and black bottoms 3/4 lenght....dri fit and light...coming back in the canal tonight I looked down underneath my arms and I see big yuckey sweat patches... crap...I hope no one will see me...hence why I always wore black....running along by the aquadome I see everyone standing under the big street light...oh for fecks sake everyone will see my sweaty patches! run into the car park but kind of do a veere right of the group to miss the direct light...so much for my new top....will revert to my black one for now...
7 miles tomorrow night...where will the route be...who cares i have to do it anyway...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)